Monday, February 22, 2010

Focusing on Your Inner Beauty ~

Relationship & Life Transition Coaching focuses on our inner strength and beauty - our ability through awareness and skill development to enjoy the most vital and satisfying relationships and lives possible. I am dedicated to the freedom and awakening that come from personal growth.

My Programs Address:

1. Genius Dating / An Innovative Approach: This is a program for all singles, whether recovering from the pain of a failed relationship or frustrated that the love of your life hasn't shown up yet. We all deserve a full and loving life. The concepts, tips and tools of self discovery I present in this program offer transformational information on how to become a conscious dater and to realize that 'good chemistry' is only the very tip of the iceberg. This program can save daters years of fruitless searching as well as mismatched relationships.

2. The Couples Roadmap to Bliss and Lasting Love: The art of relationship isn't something we naturally know how to do, witness our 55% divorce rate. It wasn't a subject taught at school and our personal models are often flawed. This program offers couples an opportunity for personal growth through new perspectives and cutting edge relational skills so that they can more fully enjoy the stages of relationship with joy, confidence and grace.

3. Choosing Commitment: Being on the fence, not knowing whether to fully commit to your romantic relationship or not, is a challenging place to be. Sometimes the signals aren't clear, we don't know what we don't know - and there are blind spots in our thinking. Given that this is one of the most important decisions of our lives, this program is designed to assist you in considering all of the important aspects and dynamics of a committed relationship as you deepen your knowledge of each other. If you and your partner will commit to this program, you will be empowered to move forward confidently.

4. Learning and Navigating Your Own and Your Partner's Money Personalities: Do you consider yourself a saver or a spender? Everyone has patterns of habits and attitudes (habitudes) about money that subconsciously influence decisions all day, every day. Those decisions - both big and small - can help you reach your personal and financial goals or sabotage your best intentions. Money Habitudes is a game that reveals one's habits and attitudes about money (often to one's great surprise!), and is an easy and effective way for people to start talking about money in a productive way. Winner of the 2009 Smart Marriages Impact Award, Money Habitudes is a simple little deck of cards that cracks the code and proves that if a couple can learn how to talk about money - with insight, understanding, and love - they can talk about, and do, anything.

5. Embracing Life's Transitions: Are you considering retirement, did you just re-locate, are you going through a divorce or getting re-married, did you just experience your son or daughter leaving for college and leaving you with an 'empty nest'? These are just some of life's transitions that can leave you feeling lost and alone until one comes up with a new plan, a new strategy, a new outlook, new skills or even just some heart felt support. This is an ideal time to partner with a coach who will support you as you move through this transition while uncovering new possibilities that will reward and sustain you as you meet the challenges.

For more information on Coaching or to schedule a complimentary initial appointment, please email me at or call me at 203 247-4613.

"I took the road less traveled by and that has made all the difference."
Robert Frost


  1. I would like to give a testimony about Candace Brindley's abilities to bring positive energy, honesty and hope into the lives of others. It was my personal delight to have worked alongside of her in a woman's group in Ridgefield, CT. Her sincerity and helpfulness made every encounter authentic.

    Candace works passionately to help others. I highly recommend her to help you, too.

    Mary Jane Hurley Brant, M.S., CGP
    Author of When Every Day Matters:
    A Mother's Memoir on Love, Loss and Life
    Simple Abundance Press, Oct. 1, 2008

  2. Dear Candace,

    The famous Swiss psychiatrist, Carl G. Jung, said what we deny, fear or don’t address consciously will visit us as fate. I agree and believe, too, if we don’t manifest our intentions, we will manifest our fears. Many people believe therapy is about resolving a crisis or healing a traumatic past and while these are worthy goals, good therapy is also like good feng shui, because it is about exploring and making our intentions conscious and meaningful.

    Balancing Yin and Yang energies in our relationships is imperative. Think about balance within the context of our feeling afraid that the relationship with our significant lover will end because our mate will find someone else so sometimes we pull away in a detached manner to the point where only our Yin (feminine) energy remains. For balance to occur "within" the context of that relationship the significant other may become understandably and notably angrier, wondering, “Where did my soul mate go?” Now the Yang (masculine) energy arrives! Normally this isn’t done consciously, no, it is unconscious and it is out of fear.

    Lillian Too (The Encyclopedia of feng shui, pg. 203) discusses the principles of Yin and Yang in how the Chinese view conjugal bliss as a double happiness! But there will never be much bliss in a home if the space is filled up with anger (Yang) as in “You never!” (An expression that actually indicates a psychic regression as does the expression, "You always!") Or feel the passive resistance (Yin) of “Oh no, husband, nothing is wrong.” Sometimes one spouse needs to be extraverted (psychology) and take the lead (Yang) and sometimes one spouse needs to be more introverted (psychology) and allow the other to lead them (Yin). One size needn’t fit all in marriage or in searching for a love relationship!

    “I felt hurt when you came home an hour late and never even called. It made me feel disrespected as though you don’t care anymore.” Psychologically this does make one vulnerable, I will agree, but it also makes one face his or her real truth and believe me, the truth does indeed set us free.

    Sometimes people will try to save money and economize, but in matters of love, it’s more costly not to implement positive changes. I know a man who after he married wife #2 said he would not get a new bed because he didn’t need one, “The one I have is fine for us!” Whoa, lots of Yang energy here from him. She, wife #2, wanting to keep the peace, shrugged her shoulders and said nothing. Lots of Yin here, too, but where’s the balance? (feng shui) Where’s the honesty? (psychology) Did he learn that kind of rigid control in his family of origin? Did she learn that peace at any price in hers? Yikes now how many people are in that bed? Wife #1, wife #2 and husband #1 every time one enters that master suite! This is not good psychology or good feng shui!

    It’s a known fact that Yin and Yang energies work together creating a harmonious space whether in your inner self or outer space. You can transform your master bedroom into one that feels warm, receptive and restful (Yin) and passionate, exciting and on fire (Yang). Think of the lovely balance you are creating as you turn the lights low (Yin) and put a match to those two juicy red candles (Yang) whose flame releases an exotic cinnamon scent in your bedroom: nice and spicy. Also, make certain you have balanced rest for nothing takes us further away from a romantic mood than exhaustion which can quickly lead us to it’s sister and brother: depression and anxiety.

    Remember, everyone loves love; it’s universal! If you are fortunate enough to have a loving attachment then cherish and protect it consciously by enhancing its chi, being mindful of your mate’s needs as well as your own, and don’t forget to keep your thoughts, your words and your actions positive. You can do it!

    Mary Jane Hurley Brant, M.S., CGP
    Author of When Every Day Matters
    Simple Abundance Press, Oct. 1, 2008